The Assistant Principal Podcast

327_WOODALL_10:20:26_FINAL.WAV

Date 2026-10-19

Frederick Buske 00:01
People are carrying a lot and unless we take time to stop and ask questions and be present and listen, we may not know what others are carrying and people may not know what we are carrying. I'm excited for this episode today to dig in and look at the difference between resilience and self care and looking at some ways that we can both help ourselves and help others before we get there. Travel can positively impact students in a big way, but if your first thought is who's going to plan all of this, don't worry because that's where Kaleidoscope Adventures comes in. The KA team has been planning student travel for more than 30 years. They handle the logistics from start to finish so you can focus on your job in the classroom. Whenever you're ready to plan a trip, Kaleidoscope Adventures can't wait. To help your group travel beyond expectations, visit MyKatripp.com today. Welcome to the Assistant Principal Podcast. I'm your host, Frederick Buske. I'm so glad you're here and that you have chosen to walk a part of your leadership journey with me. I have three guiding ideas on this show. People are the purpose of our work. Supporting and growing those around us is a core function of leadership, and we have the power to choose how we show up for others every day. In each episode, I hope to help you reflect, laugh, and take something away that you can use immediately to help you live and lead better. And now, on with the show. Craig Woodall brings 30 years in education, including 12 as principal of Rocky Mountain High School, to his work as a speaker, leadership coach, and author. He speaks with organizations and leaders on resilience, perseverance, and cultivating hope through adversity. His book, Overcome Rebuilding Hope After Losing my brother on 91 1, released in August of this year. Craig, welcome to the show.

Craig Woodall 02:29
Hey, thanks for having me. I'm excited.

Frederick Buske 02:30
Yeah, this is going to be good. So we always like to start with celebrations. So what are you celebrating today?

Craig Woodall 02:37
You know, it's, I would say my youngest daughter, Avery. She is our last one at home with us, living with mom and dad, and she is just crushing it. I texted her yesterday just reminding her of all the amazing things she's doing. And she is just an incredible kid pushing through a lot of things and doing extraordinarily well. So I'm celebrating Avery today.

Frederick Buske 02:59
Oh, that's awesome. That's sweet. Craig, is there a story that will help listeners understand why you're doing what you do?

Craig Woodall 03:09
I think it's, there's quite a few stories I think for me, my, my, my occupational career really has been around leadership. I've been a teacher, I've been a coach, I've been a assistant pr, so I've been a principal. And I've always felt I've been in leadership roles throughout. And, and so that's, that's the main thing. But then when I look at my, the private side of my life, the amount of things, the amount of adversity that I've gone through, the amount of loss that I've experienced and things that I've had to overcome and really reflect on myself and my purpose and what it means to lead and what it means to love on people and build hope. All those things combined has, has set me up to be in the situation I am now.

Frederick Buske 03:55
So I think you just mentioned the, the book and a lot of what we talk about today is in your book. Can you give listeners just kind of a brief overall summary or elevator pitch on the book?

Craig Woodall 04:06
Sure. It's called Overcome Rebuilding Hope after losing my brother on 9 11. And it is the story of my family and obviously losing my brother on 911 and the really 25 of your journey for me and for some of my family members from there of largely falling on my face and then learning to get back up, then falling down again and getting back up. And, and what it, what I learned through the process of rebuilding hope, of finding joy again and being able to laugh again. And then, and then boom, I have another loss when I lost my father. And it just kind of hopefully serves as a little bit of a, a guide for people that are struggling with things in their own life and, and not finding hope as often as they used to. Hopefully they can find that in this book.

Frederick Buske 04:57
I love that phrase, finding joy again. And I think there are a lot of listeners that have experienced that deep loss, especially when you have that unexpected loss. And, and I think that phrase will really resonate because it does take work to be able to continue the work and, and move forward and pick yourself up.

Craig Woodall 05:25
It takes work, but it also, it takes, it takes the willingness to say it's okay. For a long time, I didn't think I could laugh. Felt disrespectful to laugh again. Like, why am I laughing? Why am I enjoying today? Why am I doing any of these things and going on a trip? So you have to give yourself permission. So it's hard work and give yourself permission to find that joy.

Frederick Buske 05:46
Okay, so let's just, let's dig in. Start right there. Listeners know that I've Had a lot of personal stuff going on this year. And just people I care for, very close to me have had just life altering struggles. And one of the challenges I was finding early on was that I love my work. I love getting on a podcast and talking with people like you. I love writing, I love training. And there's so much joy that comes from my work. And I found myself in this situation where I would exit from the kind of hands on, horrible stuff, personally come into my workspace and start to feel good and start to find that joy and, and then had that thought, just like you said. No, how that's wrong, how I can't be happy. How can I be happy when this person I love when their, their life is falling apart like this? And. And I had a conversation with another professional, she's an executive director at a nonprofit. And, and she was going through some things as well. And she said that that is one of the side things that really sucks about loss and tragedy. And when you're going through things, and I think we don't talk about it, Craig, that it, it takes the. You feel guilty for feeling good.

Craig Woodall 07:19
Yeah. And like I said, you got to give yourself permission. And some of that for me was margin. How much margin did I have? So like you said, I kind of would start feeling good at work because I'd almost forget about everything else that's going on. Because when I tried to think of it all at one time, it was overwhelming. And I just didn't have the margin to, to teach, to be a parent, to be a spouse, to be a friend. I couldn't do it all at once. And so I had to compartmentalize. And often early on, what was pushed to the side was any kind of grieving, any kind of trying to get through the process, because I thought grieving was just forgetting. I kind of just got to move past it. I got to set this down, I got to forget about it. And, and I wasn't doing any intentional work in trying to get through it because I didn't have the margin to do it all. So I can definitely relate to, to what you're experiencing.

Frederick Buske 08:14
I think about how I approach things today versus what I would have in my 30s, 40s, and probably even my early 50s. And this idea that you could just. I'll take those emotions, I'll just put them in a box, I'll put them in the back of the closet and it'll be fine. And I think sometimes when I was younger, I used to really think that I was doing that when I look back on it now, I realized, no, that stuff was still walking with me. And so part of this process of being able to do that separation, I think, is on the one hand, acknowledging the pain, acknowledging the situation, and not just. And saying, I know you. You're here. I cannot give my full attention to this pain today. So I'm going to set you over here because I'm going to focus on being with Craig and finding joy in that. And then I know I'm going to come back to you. To me. There's a real difference in doing that versus just locking it away and pretending it doesn't exist.

Craig Woodall 09:19
Right. And for months, I locked it away, pretending it didn't exist. That's all I did and tried to run from it. And one of my favorite quotes from C.S. lewis is, you know, I sat with anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief. Because I didn't know why I was so. Why I was so angry. I just thought, I'm doing too much. I'm stressed, I'm too busy. And it's like, no, I'm grieving, but I'm not even letting myself grieve. And, you know, the example of setting it down to be present, you know, I talk a lot about grief is almost like you wake up every morning with that heavy blanket on you, and you have decision to make. And that's why so many people say, I can't get out of bed. Well, because it's just too much on top of you. So what do we normally do? What you just described, we set it down onto the side, throw it on the floor, and you get home, you're like, oh, my gosh, I got to pick that back up. And so once I realize that, no, I don't want to do that anymore. Instead, I want to get stronger. And so I can just carry that blanket with me. And it's just part of who I am. It's part of my baggage. It's part of me, but it's not defining me. It's not all of me, because I've become a more purposeful, more intentional, stronger individual. So now I can carry what life has handed me, and I don't have to just set it down all the time.

Frederick Buske 10:31
So I'm really interested. I'd love to hear you dig into that a little bit more. You said I carry it, but it doesn't define me. Can you say more about that?

Craig Woodall 10:41
So I'm a believer that any kind of adversity, be it tragedy, loss, diagnosis, job issues, financial things Family stuff. All of those things can do three things to you. They can either. They can either define you, diminish you, or develop you. And I experienced all three of those. first, it defined me. It was my identity. It was what I thought about in the morning, when I got up, when I went to bed. That's all I talked about. That's all anyone asked me questions about. It was my identity. And then it diminished me. It defeated me. It took away my joy, it took away my inspiration. It took away any passion I had to achieve anything. I just kind of went through the motions and became just a kind of a shell of myself. And it wasn't until I literally had an epiphany or seven months later, walking across the parking lot, dragging my feet, head down, that I felt this. Hey, enough. Pick your head up. You're not defeated. I was like, oh, my gosh, you're right. I'm just. I'm walking through life spiraling out of control, and if I don't turn around and face this and figure out a way to pick up this baggage and carry it with me, because it's not going to go away. He's gone. I. I have to. I have to come to grips with that. And that. That moment, I wasn't healed. I wasn't fixed. I wasn't done grieving. I hadn't even started any of that yet. I just simply decided I have to take this on and I have to do this for myself, for my family, for my friends, for my brother and his legacy, because I certainly was not any kind of positive experience in that way either. So, yeah, it's. Define diminish or develop. I experienced all three. But when I allowed it to develop me, that's when I really started to grow.

Frederick Buske 12:29
And is it. Isn't it amazing that in each of those three phases, we are. Whether we're conscious of it or not, we are choosing to sit in one of those spaces. Right. Tony Robbins has this great quote, decision is the ultimate power. Actually have it taped to my computer. And I love it, because what it reminds me is I have the power to decide, and in making the decision to move forward, that, you know, that is strength. And I remember having these feelings of just being down, and I remember getting up on days and saying, today's going to be a terrible day, and knowing, no, I'm in control of my thoughts. I could turn that around and. And telling myself, no, I'm not going to turn that around. I'm just going to sulk and be pouty. And be miserable today. And I think there's a time to sit with that grief, but you can't let it. I think, like you said, define and just diminish you over the long term. But it is a process.

Craig Woodall 13:36
Yeah. That reminds me of my favorite. My mantra throughout this whole thing is, Carl Jung, the famous psychiatrist, said, I am not what happened to me and what I choose to become. And I, for so long was a version of myself based on what happened to me. And it was defining me, diminishing me, all those kind of things. And it wasn't until, like you just said, I can make a decision to change. And it wasn't like I made that decision. And then it was smooth sailing going forward. That is a daily decision, sometimes an hourly decision as to how are you going to handle this situation. Because I'd put my teacher hat on at school and I'd be positive and I talk about stuff and I'd go to practice and we do get through and I come home and just fall on the couch and just feel it all again and let it all back. And I don't even know what kind of father I was at the time or husband at the time because I was letting it choose for me. So it wasn't until I chose what I wanted to become that I really started to see the change.

Frederick Buske 14:34
Urban Meyer has this thing. I think he stole it from somebody else. I don't know. I read it in his book. E R equals O. So event response equals. Equals outcome. Right. And we don't control the events. All we control is the response. And I. I think that's a very empowering way to look at things. I know there are people that don't look at the world that way that just have too much focus, I think, in my mind, too much focus on the event piece. I'm just curious, as you went on your journey, were there things that you did to consistently remind you that you had the choice, that you had the power on how you would move through the day?

Craig Woodall 15:22
For me, I completely redid my morning routine. Instead of, excuse me, instead of just sleeping in as late as I could, laying on the couch, being lazy, I. I decided, no, I'm going to get up extra early and I'm just going to spend time in silence to start. Often it was prayer, but sometimes it was just silen trying to combat those negative and recurring thoughts in my brain and just try to replace them with gratitude or hope and felt hypocritical at times. But I try to put in that work and then I would read everything I could on grief, on the Bible, on just inspirational things to try to pick me up. Then I would exercise. And those three things changed everything for me. And the exercise wasn't so much just because I needed to get back in shape, what it did for my mental and spiritual and emotional health and just in feeling those endorphins. And I know when I exercise, I'm more intentional, I'm more purposeful, I'm more present. And I believe that's how we're made. To be is to. Is to move our bodies, to feel those things. And so those three things that I committed to doing almost every morning were game changers. And it got to where, you know, working out in those things is so hard to start, and because you don't see the response right, right away. And so one day didn't change much. Five days. I started developing a new habit. After a few weeks, I was like, I can't go by without this. I need to feel this all the time. And. And that was really the point where I started to see things turn, and I became a stronger, more intentional version of myself.

Frederick Buske 17:06
I do a lot of work with nonprofit leaders around morning routine because I think it is one of the things that builds resilience in us. Did an episode with my daughter Mara, just probably two months ago about our morning routines, so. So listeners may have heard it, and. And a lot of what you talked about in there, I think, is pretty similar. One of the things that has really helped me through the challenging times is my practice of affirmations. So I do morning journaling. I have now 12 aspirations or affirmations. They're both aspirations and affirmations that I put down to help grind, to help ground me. And you use the word being intentional. And I think for listeners, anybody looking at that morning routine, there are multiple layers to it. But in a nutshell, what it does is it allows you to be intentional and make choices.

Craig Woodall 18:06
And I did affirmations for a while, too, myself, and it felt odd, it felt forced. It's effective. And so I. I would do that. And, you know, John Acuff talks about soundtracks. I don't know if you've read that. It's a similar thing. It's just rewriting the soundtrack in your brain and. And changing that. And so he has some really cool affirmat ratings that I started to use about. You know, I've packed honesty, integrity, and joy for the day. And so you're right, as funny as it felt, I. I didn't care for it, I felt kind of silly, but it was, it was a very positive experience. I don't do them as much anymore, but it was pretty critical in my development.

Frederick Buske 18:48
Yeah, I, I've been surprised how, how much I have really leaned on mine. And it's funny that they, they help me at the margins on those days and those activities where I'm like, I don't know if I really want to show up for this. That's where my affirmations tend to. To kick in. And they've made a big difference, especially in the most stressful times. So, yeah, I did an episode on affirmations too. So again, regular listeners know. Know what we're talking about. Hey, one of the other things I wanted to talk about was the difference between resilience and self care. And I see these two things differently. I'm not sure how you see them, but I'd love to have that discussion.

Craig Woodall 19:38
Sure. So I guess just hearing that, to me, self care is all encompassing. It's how you prepare yourself for the day. It's how you honor the body you've been given. It's. It's the hard work you do to be the best version of yourself. And when you do that resilience, you have the capacity to be resilient. And so I do see them as slightly different, actually fairly different, because you can choose to be resilient and not have self care, but it's not going to last very long. And you can choose to take care of yourself and still not be very resilient. And so that combination was huge for me once I started taking better care of myself and realized the importance of digging in and finding that resilience because you're as strong as you need to be, but you don't know that until you're in the moment. And so I felt so just knocked down over and over and over. But when I started to feel that strength was when I did all that self care. And so I guess maybe I would say an outcome of self care could be the ability to be resilient and trying to do it without self care. You'll hit it at times, you'll feel it in the moment sometimes, but it won't have the lasting impact unless you're taking care of yourself.

Frederick Buske 20:55
Yeah, I wonder if part of it too is self care is the what you do. I did journal, I did exercise, I did reflect at the end of the day. That's self care stuff. Resilience is a process. Resilience is the fact that when I get up in the morning I do these things. That's my. That's my resilience practice. I don't know. Just playing with the words.

Craig Woodall 21:18
Sure, yeah. Both. Both are critical and done independently. Effective, but done together much more powerful.

Frederick Buske 21:27
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Craig Woodall 22:57
What I realized in this process was I had to work really hard to take care of myself and begin the grieving process and find resilience. All the things we discussed. But along the way, I discovered a lot about leadership and I discovered a lot about who I was to other people and understand other people. I learned to communicate so much better because I focused on listening. Because when I was going through stress struggles, I felt like people were there to listen. But what I was saying was pretty dark and pretty down, and so they'd kind of just cut me off. So I saw the power of listening. And so I learned to just ask you, what else? When they come in, what else? Just to dig in in their communication. I was raised very much. I believe there's two kinds of leaders. Here I am or there you are, leader. I was raised in a here I am family. My dad was, you know, a very successful businessman. A large guy, an intense guy. When he walked in the room, he owned the room. Here I am. I am here to get what I need. My brother was very similar to that. That's how I was raised. And so early in my career as a teacher, as a coach, it was about me. I was a sage on the Stage. When I talk, you listen, you sit. I. That's just what I thought it was. And when I went through all this, I realized everyone is carrying something, right? And so just let's honor people and let's be about people and about hope, not about status or not about power. And I switched a, there you are leader, there you are teacher, or there you are coach. Right. More interested in what you need than what I needed. And it. It. You know what? It, as a principal is sometimes a struggle because people expect you to be a here I am leader. They want you to make the decision when you walk in the room. Like, I'm more curious what you think. And it frustrated some people at times. But, you know, it's the Maya Angelou quote of, you know, it's not what you say or what you do. They're going to remember how you made them feel, you know, and. And I'm one of the lucky ones that was able to retire and add all the cards and all the comments and the videos and the speeches at a retirement party, and no one mentioned, wow, you raised grad rates, great job. Or the subgroups, you know, got so much better between the PSAT and asa. It didn't come up. What they said was, I remember when you covered my class when I was having a tough day. I remember when you brought pizzas to my house when I was quarantined. I remember when you let me sit in your office and just cry it out when my dad died. Although that's what came out, how I made them feel. None of that would have happened had I not gone through this process. And so it's amazing that sometimes what is your biggest challenge or your biggest adversity can also be what creates the greatest strength within you. You know, when you look at, I think, the most authentic people, the most genuine people are often people who have tremendous adversity of any kind in their background because they've had to go through those stages to get to where they are. Not everyone chooses to, but often that is the case, and that is certainly me. There's a. There's a Chinese proverb that says, if you want to know the road ahead, ask those coming back. I didn't do that. I just did it on my own because I didn't know how to grieve. I didn't want to burden anyone. I didn't want to feel it. I didn't. And so once I started bringing in some of that support, then I started to learn some things. And now I can say I'm One of the people on the road coming back, I am one of the people that can help. The amount of people I've sat with in their grief or their adversity, that's a skill I never wanted, and I don't wish it on anyone. But I've developed it, and I've been able to bring that to other people. And that's. That's a. Just a beautiful side gift to this whole journey.

Frederick Buske 26:47
Yeah. I have found, too, that sharing my grief and the tragedy that I've been living with in a measured way, not saying, oh, look at me, was me. Right. But. But acknowledging that there is this thing going on, and inevitably people come up and they say, well, I'm experiencing the same thing, or I have this other situation going on. And. And being a little bit vulnerable creates that sense of community, but also be. People might be surprised at how many people around us are carrying really deep, heavy stuff. And. And when we create a little bit of space for that, I think we. We build a culture that's just a little bit more human.

Craig Woodall 27:43
Yeah. When I've been able to present on this every time someone comes up with their story of, oh, my gosh, I'm going through this. And what I've heard the. The most is how comforting it has been to the group that there is a really a man up there talking about mental health in a vulnerable way. Because so often we want to say, hey, pick yourself up. Get stronger, get tougher. Do that. It's like, no, I was. I was wrecked, but I was a shell of myself. I couldn't beat this. I. I'm a competitor. I'm an athlete. I always beat things. That's. I couldn't do it. And so I had to find strength in other ways. I had to do that. That vulnerability, I think, has. Has reached a lot of people.

Frederick Buske 28:24
Yeah. And I. And I want to go back also to what you said. Here I am versus there you are. And you acknowledge this.

Craig Woodall 28:33
We.

Frederick Buske 28:33
We live in a society where our imagery surrounding leadership is the here I am. Right. And we're asking leaders to be the vision and be the voice and be at the center. And so I think it is a challenge to find the. The balance in that, to. To not to be able to step out of that center and not be at the center and yet be the lighthouse that everybody else wants you to be. Right. It's. It's this really challenging marriage of these two very different ways of being, I think.

Craig Woodall 29:11
Well, and I think it's not even just leadership anymore in our society. Everyone's trying to live. Here I am. Look at me on social media. Look at what I did. Look what I had for breakfast. Look at. That is our culture right now. You know, And I think a lot of people say that's what being American is. Here I am. And it's like, wow, that's. That's how we. That's why we're not all getting along, because it's about me. Right. Instead of let's about us. You know, I joke that, you know, back in the 1900s, we used to be able to have conversations with people we disagreed with and just be like, oh, that's an interesting point. I disagree completely. But still, go get some pizza. But now, no, I. Here I am, and it's my opinion, and I'm taking up my space and I'm doing this. Yeah, it's not. It's leaders. It's everyone at this point. It's everywhere.

Frederick Buske 30:03
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Craig Woodall 30:57
I think the. I guess I would say other than redoing my morning routine and all that, what helped me the most was finally being willing to accept help. And I'll say, like, the most courageous thing you can say is help. And I did not think that. I thought that was weakness. And so it wasn't until I opened myself up to support. That means so many people were there. And I had so many people that never gave up on so, like, happy that these people were. Even when I kept pushing them away, they just kept showing up and. And so finding the ability, the. The willingness, the vulnerability to ask for help and accept that help along your journey is so critical, and especially for leaders, you feel like you can't ask for help. I have to have. I'm taking care of you, not me, right? It's like, no, you need to take care of yourself. It's old adage of, you know, you can't pour from an empty cup. I tried. I tried every day to pour from an empty cup. And when I couldn't do it anymore, I just made my cup smaller and did fewer things. And so now I am intentionally filling my cup and every single day so that I have more margin to help other people. But it was that help that I received that kind of got me through that. Craig, what.

Frederick Buske 32:22
What was a. Kind of the step or the impetus that got you to that final point? Like, I know there was a long road leading up to being able to ask for help, but do you remember kind of what the final step was for you and then what asking for help looked like initially?

Craig Woodall 32:43
So I think for me, it was people that just kept showing up and kept offering help. You know, I was back in New York so much that first. Those first few years and I'd be gone. And, you know, every time we're like, I don't know how we're going to even pay for a ticket. I don't. We can't even afford a ticket. But I just feel like I need to go and be out there. And then out of nowhere, someone would contact me who I didn't even know, saying, I have a free ticket. Will you take it? I'm like, no, but, gosh, I need it. And so I had. I just, against my own desires, had to accept help. And then I realized, wow, these people, not only is it a benefit to me, it's a benefit to them. There is. There's so much strength you get in serving others. And, you know, I came home once from a trip to New York, and I'd been sitting with, you know, my basement. I'd finished part of it and just been sitting that way for a year. It just. I didn't have the margin to do it. Came home and I'm like, kind of smells like paint. Like, why does it smell like paint? And I went downstairs and my friend had come over, finished it, painted it, and just left. It's like, what. Like, that's what people will do for each other. And yes, they're doing it to support you, but it also fills their cup in being able to do that. And so once I realized that, that it's mutually beneficial, this help model, I started to accept it a little more. And what it encouraged me to do was tell more people. It's like, well, if I'm going to be helped this much, I'm going to help even more than. And it was almost like a competition in my mind. But still, people were benefiting because I was getting the help I needed and other people were getting the help I needed. But I don't remember a specific moment other than those couple of examples where people just kept helping me and I kept having to finally accept it.

Frederick Buske 34:27
Yeah. I think we have this record that we play or this narrative that, well, if I ask people for help, then I'm being selfish.

Craig Woodall 34:38
And.

Frederick Buske 34:39
And I think the inverse is actually true when we deny the opportunity of people to help us when we need it. Right. And we're suffering, which means we're not able to take as good a care of other people because we have this pride and we don't want to ask for help or we don't want to air quotes, burden others. So I would remind listeners that when you allow someone to help you, that is a blessing to them. They're not doing it because if it's an obligation, they're doing it because they want to support you and that makes them feel good in turn.

Craig Woodall 35:13
Absolutely. Yeah. That was a huge learning for me. I did not grow up in a house where that was a common thing. We didn't. We didn't really help each other that way. Most of it felt like a burden. And so to release that guilt and just feel the help and being a law for help was a game changer.

Frederick Buske 35:32
Yeah. So, Craig, as we start to wrap up, I'm wondering, what part of your own leadership are you still trying to get better at?

Craig Woodall 35:42
I would say serving others, because now that's all I'm doing. Because I'm not in a position where I'm leading a school. I've been out for a year. And so I'm reaching out to leaders I know and aspiring leaders and trying to support them. And I didn't know if I'd be any good at that. I knew I was pretty good at working with teachers and encouraging them, but aspiring leaders, do I have anything to offer? And so it's been a constant growth for me to. Oh, that's a challenge I never had. And so let's dig into that together. So it's really been eye opening to meet with all these principals and aspiring leaders just to hear what they're going through and really challenge myself. Am I any good at this? Do I have anything to offer these people? Or am I just thinking it's. There's one way to do it? And it's been. It's been a really positive experience for me, but it's one I certainly need to keep growing in.

Frederick Buske 36:29
Yeah, well, I think you said something really important that when we do this work and, and we're with people that as long as we're trying to also learn from them, then you know, that's the mark of growth. And, and that means we're probably going to be being pretty good listeners. Craig, if listeners could take away just one thing from today's podcast, what would it be?

Craig Woodall 36:53
I'd say the power of the word yet. You know, we all look at our moments and say, I'm just not strong enough. I'm just not there. I just can't do it. And if you just take those same thoughts and just put yet on the end, I'm just not there yet. I'm just not strong enough yet. You can take back control of the thoughts that are in your mind. You don't have to believe everything you think. And I used to. And that first thought that comes roaring out every time something bad happens, you're probably not going to change that. But I've learned to disregard it and sometimes even laugh at it and replace it with a positive thought, replace it with a yet statement. When I'm like, I just can't do. There's no way I could do this yet. My kids kind of get tired of hearing it because almost everything they say I'll say yet. But I think it's a powerful thing. It's the, it's the comma of the sentence instead of the period or the exclamation mark. It's that there is continuation at that there is, I believe there is hope at the end of this all comes from the power of that one small, kind of funny looking word yet.

Frederick Buske 38:00
Craig, thanks so much for coming on the show and sharing today. This has been great.

Craig Woodall 38:04
Yeah, thank you for the opportunity.

Frederick Buske 38:18
Just want to touch on three things from this episode. The first is the quote. I carry it, but it doesn't define me. I think one of the challenges that we face when we're dealing with trauma is to acknowledge it and not just stuff it in the box, but also, but incorporate it into the fabric of our lives without it being the whole fabric. So I thought that quote really is a powerful one and a good one to keep in mind. I carry it, but it doesn't define me. Related to that. So many people are carrying things and you can't always tell, and that's why we should listen more. And finally, Craig talked a little bit about those negative thoughts, which also can be the doubts, the undermining, and also some of that imposter syndrome. Remember, those negative thoughts are designed to keep you safe, but they keep you safe at the expense of your own growth. So when you have some of that negativity pop up in your head for whatever reason, recognize that it's probably a signal to you that you're trying to move forward and trying to grow or heal in some way. Leadership is a journey and thank you for choosing to walk some of this magical path with me. You can find links to all sorts of stuff in the show Notes, including my website frederickbusky.com I love hearing from you. If you have comments or questions or are interested in having me speak at your school or conference, email me at frederickredrickbusky.com or connect with me on LinkedIn. If you're tired of spending time putting out fires and would rather invest time supporting and growing teachers, consider reading my book A School Leader's Guide to Reclaiming Purpose. The book is available on Amazon and you can find links to it as well as free book study materials on my website. Please remember to subscribe, rate and review the podcast. Remember, the secret to good leadership is to be intentional in choosing how you will show up for others to be fully present, to ask reflective questions and then just listen. Don't over complicate it. The value is in the listening. Have a great rest of the week. Cheers. Sam.